"Briar" by Milena Makani
Nicole Fegan | o brave new world
for m
no, i never had a lip gloss phone
sticky finger sno cone dripping in the summer
locket hanging soft over tender heart
or one of those makeup cases
layer after layer of pink-tip wands
and tangerine blush
no, i played games with my girlhood
like a home of trap doors
of seventh grade math class
when lexie said, you know,
you’re kinda like two-fifths guy
of one-piece swimsuits snug
under winter sweaters
of carpentry and older brother’s birthday parties
of telling my four friends
to play recess without me—
i’d much rather watch instead
it’s not that i questioned my girlhood;
it’s just that i didn’t care.
but when we sit on your floor
with the elmwood mirror
and you ask if i think gold or silver
or red or berry, i shimmer.
i am ten years old in my friend’s room
—let me rewrite the memory—
night of the school play, slender hand extending
phantom brush to do her eyeshadow,
and this time, in this version,
i take it.
no, i never much cared to be a girl
until i met you.
let us float, aimless,
cherry-cool and beautiful; let us howl
and hymn in our very own sea;
let us dress as sirens for the tempest,
—together—
just because we can.
no, i never had a lip gloss phone
sticky finger sno cone dripping in the summer
locket hanging soft over tender heart
or one of those makeup cases
layer after layer of pink-tip wands
and tangerine blush
no, i played games with my girlhood
like a home of trap doors
of seventh grade math class
when lexie said, you know,
you’re kinda like two-fifths guy
of one-piece swimsuits snug
under winter sweaters
of carpentry and older brother’s birthday parties
of telling my four friends
to play recess without me—
i’d much rather watch instead
it’s not that i questioned my girlhood;
it’s just that i didn’t care.
but when we sit on your floor
with the elmwood mirror
and you ask if i think gold or silver
or red or berry, i shimmer.
i am ten years old in my friend’s room
—let me rewrite the memory—
night of the school play, slender hand extending
phantom brush to do her eyeshadow,
and this time, in this version,
i take it.
no, i never much cared to be a girl
until i met you.
let us float, aimless,
cherry-cool and beautiful; let us howl
and hymn in our very own sea;
let us dress as sirens for the tempest,
—together—
just because we can.
Nicole Fegan is poet, editorial assistant, and logic puzzle maker currently living in Brooklyn. Her poetry has appeared or is forthcoming in trampset, Heimat Review, and Thimble Literary Magazine, among others. You can find more of her work at https://www.nicole-fegan.com
Milena Makani, born in 1984 in Sofia, Bulgaria, is a German contemporary artist based in London, UK. Makani’s deeply psychological paintings depict inner landscapes characterized by layered textures, fluid forms and gradients. Employing acrylics, watercolours and inks on mineral stone sheets, she blends control and spontaneity through the interplay of organic process and manipulation. Makani lives with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome - a source of constant pain. Her works channel the mindfulness, gratitude and energy of her lived experience, as she investigates themes of resilience, serenity, joy, stoicism and fragility.
The German artist has exhibited her work in the UK, Bulgaria and Iceland and her paintings are featured internationally in various private collections.
The German artist has exhibited her work in the UK, Bulgaria and Iceland and her paintings are featured internationally in various private collections.
