"Tub & Tank" by Eva Dominelli
Two poems by Khalypso
The Sound of Us is Dead
“No, not “Baby” anymore. If I need you, I’ll just use your simple name”
—Fiona Apple
The first time I had sex I made love like an aphid.
Everything dead from Florin Rd. to Carmichael,
we had nothing to stroll past but the dirt.
The hum of your stick shift shakes our contumacious fingers
to attention and I can’t help but beg you to kiss me
how you love her. We make music like the focus I gave
to my birthday candles and after, we both taste like vaginosis
and sweat. I only ever want you when you are lying to me
and love you when you claim your distance from my
taciturn skin. It is easy to fear your absence,
a blooming populated mystery in the crunch
of the autumn leaves we depress with our stumbling toes
and I’ll remember your selfishness forever. the slammed
door. your stubborn knuckles. the yield of your
breath. When they ask me what you were like I will tell them
my ex-lover’s voice is the color yellow. The only
light between our fresh dead hearts as it sank
into a flayed pink and then retreated into the dark.
—Fiona Apple
The first time I had sex I made love like an aphid.
Everything dead from Florin Rd. to Carmichael,
we had nothing to stroll past but the dirt.
The hum of your stick shift shakes our contumacious fingers
to attention and I can’t help but beg you to kiss me
how you love her. We make music like the focus I gave
to my birthday candles and after, we both taste like vaginosis
and sweat. I only ever want you when you are lying to me
and love you when you claim your distance from my
taciturn skin. It is easy to fear your absence,
a blooming populated mystery in the crunch
of the autumn leaves we depress with our stumbling toes
and I’ll remember your selfishness forever. the slammed
door. your stubborn knuckles. the yield of your
breath. When they ask me what you were like I will tell them
my ex-lover’s voice is the color yellow. The only
light between our fresh dead hearts as it sank
into a flayed pink and then retreated into the dark.
On Chronic Pain (The Little Mermaid)
O, How I have been split.
How I’ve known this body, blended
from the waist down & unfamiliar.
O, How I have cast my voice
to the wind & had it returned foam.
O, Have I known a man, loved a man,
just to fall asleep at his side & wake
with my freedom in his ribcage.
When I say I know pain, I
mean the salt reaches the corners
of this body & gangrene sprouts.
This prison as unholy as the cry
of a starving baby gull—And O,
Do I know hunger!
Childless, dreadful hunger.
O, Do I know the pain
it takes to divest of this world,
half-sunken among the wreckage
of ships, half-tossed into the midnight,
without a song to send me off.
How I’ve known this body, blended
from the waist down & unfamiliar.
O, How I have cast my voice
to the wind & had it returned foam.
O, Have I known a man, loved a man,
just to fall asleep at his side & wake
with my freedom in his ribcage.
When I say I know pain, I
mean the salt reaches the corners
of this body & gangrene sprouts.
This prison as unholy as the cry
of a starving baby gull—And O,
Do I know hunger!
Childless, dreadful hunger.
O, Do I know the pain
it takes to divest of this world,
half-sunken among the wreckage
of ships, half-tossed into the midnight,
without a song to send me off.
Khalypso is a Sacramento-based activist, actor, and poet. They are fat, black, neurodivergent, queer and badass. Their work can be found in Calamus Journal, Drunk in a Midnight Choir, Rigorous Journal, Wusgood Magazine, and Shade Journal, as well as a few others. They are a Leo-Virgo cusp, they want to be your friend, and you can find them on Twitter at @KhalypsoThePoet.
Eva Dominelli is a Vancouver artist and freelance Illustrator with a BFA in Illustration from Emily Carr University of Art and Design. Her mysterious gouache and ink illustrations playfully investigate the relationship between the private and the public experience of the everyday. She is currently working on her upcoming artist’s book Between Being & Nothingness.
You can view more of her work at evadominelli.com, on facebook @evadominelliillustration or on instagram @eva.avenue.
You can view more of her work at evadominelli.com, on facebook @evadominelliillustration or on instagram @eva.avenue.
