"I Thought We Were Alone Together But We Were Together and Alone" by Eva Dominelli
the ladder of tyre by Sylvan Lebrun
I. irony is the time I tried to force myself to cry because I wanted to feel some sort of
catharsis. needless to say it didn’t work.
II. how to confess a secret:
we caught the last train a few minutes before midnight. it didn’t leave the station at first,
just sat there with the doors open wide, no one coming in or out. just us, clothes smelling
of other people’s cigarettes, side by side in all this empty space.
I think I’m going back.
side by side, just us, of course she didn’t know what I had to go back to. didn’t turn her
head to look at me, just faced the shell of the train car doorway as she whispered not
shouted (though there was no one to hear anyways)
I think I lie too much.
III. i am breathing where the air hits the sea / my ears ring and burrow further into my skull,
into the place where I didn’t know there could even be the imitation of sound / i want to
take all the letters i wrote myself and watch them disintegrate / take all the lies and
falsehoods and burn them into peace, burn them in the crests of waves until they no more
can be thought of / i want to have a clear soul, and a sordid mind. let that be my
coexistence.
IV. I want to be beautiful so that I may not be loved –
and let me leave this and all the corporeal, and be one against the sonar again.
catharsis. needless to say it didn’t work.
II. how to confess a secret:
we caught the last train a few minutes before midnight. it didn’t leave the station at first,
just sat there with the doors open wide, no one coming in or out. just us, clothes smelling
of other people’s cigarettes, side by side in all this empty space.
I think I’m going back.
side by side, just us, of course she didn’t know what I had to go back to. didn’t turn her
head to look at me, just faced the shell of the train car doorway as she whispered not
shouted (though there was no one to hear anyways)
I think I lie too much.
III. i am breathing where the air hits the sea / my ears ring and burrow further into my skull,
into the place where I didn’t know there could even be the imitation of sound / i want to
take all the letters i wrote myself and watch them disintegrate / take all the lies and
falsehoods and burn them into peace, burn them in the crests of waves until they no more
can be thought of / i want to have a clear soul, and a sordid mind. let that be my
coexistence.
IV. I want to be beautiful so that I may not be loved –
and let me leave this and all the corporeal, and be one against the sonar again.
Sylvan Lebrun is a student, poet, and musician living in Tokyo, Japan. Her work has been previously published in The Lavender Review, Bitterzoet Magazine, The Fourth River, and Crab Fat Magazine.
Eva Dominelli is a Vancouver artist and freelance Illustrator with a BFA in Illustration from Emily Carr University of Art and Design. Her mysterious gouache and ink illustrations playfully investigate the relationship between the private and the public experience of the everyday. She is currently working on her upcoming artist’s book Between Being & Nothingness.
You can view more of her work at evadominelli.com, on facebook @evadominelliillustration or on instagram @eva.avenue.
You can view more of her work at evadominelli.com, on facebook @evadominelliillustration or on instagram @eva.avenue.
